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Post by Maliku on Oct 11, 2006 20:16:28 GMT -5
Valgaera, WRITE NAO!
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Post by dogonda on Oct 11, 2006 20:17:08 GMT -5
Is this dead... It just got good....
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Post by DEATH97 on Oct 12, 2006 8:39:57 GMT -5
Surely not.. Say it ain't so Val...Say it ain't so!!
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Post by Maliku on Oct 12, 2006 15:14:59 GMT -5
No! It can't be dead.
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Valgaera
Inactive Member
I am the Light within the Darkness
Je suis le Lumi?re dans l'Obscurit
Posts: 124
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Post by Valgaera on Oct 15, 2006 19:57:16 GMT -5
Its not dead. I promise. I've been out of town all weekend, and busy the week prior. I have some wrrok to finish up, but I promise I'll write tonight. Unfortunatly, the next part is essential and rather tricky. I wish to take my time.
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Post by DEATH97 on Oct 15, 2006 20:16:49 GMT -5
take your time Valgaera I was just getting worried, hadn't seen ya in a while
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Valgaera
Inactive Member
I am the Light within the Darkness
Je suis le Lumi?re dans l'Obscurit
Posts: 124
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Post by Valgaera on Oct 18, 2006 18:51:16 GMT -5
I should be doing homework, but I want to write.
Desire> Requirements
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Valgaera
Inactive Member
I am the Light within the Darkness
Je suis le Lumi?re dans l'Obscurit
Posts: 124
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Post by Valgaera on Oct 18, 2006 19:24:13 GMT -5
I'll start writing after 1 comment, and post after 3. Part 2, that is
It was not in Kanest’s nature to flee from a fight. Coupled with the fact that he would give his life to the survival of his camp, Vin knew Kanest must be chasing someone. More than likely, it was the assassin who started the bloodshed. If Kanest was even a fraction as furious, horrified, devastated as Vin was, he knew that a great fight was on the horizon.
Running through the woods, the sounds of battle were left behind. Darkness began to encompass Vin in swirling circles. All sound was muffled by the lack of feeling in the nighttime woods. Frowning whilst he sprinted, Vin softly muttered to himself. Radune, Luize. A calm green glow encircled Vin’s figure, batting away the darkness easily as Vin could crush an ant. The light spell helped Vin find his way through the forest. Just on the edge of his circle of illumination, Vin could make out sparks of light dancing of the rippled end of Kanest’s cloak. The shines dances and twirled like acrobats as the cloth fluttered across the dark ground.
Vin ran even faster as he noted an increase in Kanest’s speed. Whoever they were chasing, he was close. Despite the age difference Vin could only watch in dismay as the figure of the elder elf faded away, and disappeared completely. The elf was a master of athletics, so much as a skilled bladesman.
The young elf continued his flight until Kanest’s visage was all but gone. Stopping, leaning over, and heaving, Vin scrutinized the ground for any sign of Kanest’s passing. Vin said a silent prayer to Talos as he found a golden strip of cloth intwined around an elegant root protruding from the ground. From the way the cloth was caught, it looked as if Kanest was trailing the man north.
Making a quick turn in that direction, Vin doubled his pace as the sounds of combat reached his ears. Bursting through the final layer of foliage, Vin saw his master and the Stranger circling a muddy clearing. Neither spoke, but all three of the men in the clearing knew what was to come. A fight, for each man's life. [/size]
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Post by dogonda on Oct 18, 2006 19:44:06 GMT -5
It was ok, just the things i pointed out to you in aim.
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Valgaera
Inactive Member
I am the Light within the Darkness
Je suis le Lumi?re dans l'Obscurit
Posts: 124
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Post by Valgaera on Oct 18, 2006 19:45:02 GMT -5
I need to write more often, basically.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 18, 2006 19:55:22 GMT -5
yea
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Post by Maliku on Oct 18, 2006 20:15:59 GMT -5
I loved the ending. I will be waiting for me.
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Post by DEATH97 on Oct 18, 2006 20:44:07 GMT -5
Nice to see an update to this story. The quality of this update is lacking compared to what you had already written, but I feel you are just rusty, and I believe it will come back to you. Don't get me wrong its still very good, but the flow of the narrative is alittle off compared to what you had written previously. I'd tell you my opinion on what to do to fix this, but I can't put my finger on what exactly that is. Also I'm alittle groggy so this could just be me.. Still I enjoyed what I read, and I can't wait to see what happens next.
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Valgaera
Inactive Member
I am the Light within the Darkness
Je suis le Lumi?re dans l'Obscurit
Posts: 124
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Post by Valgaera on Oct 19, 2006 18:49:38 GMT -5
yeah. Its really just a tie in between the first attack and the-
Well, you'll find out......
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Valgaera
Inactive Member
I am the Light within the Darkness
Je suis le Lumi?re dans l'Obscurit
Posts: 124
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Post by Valgaera on Oct 19, 2006 18:55:11 GMT -5
Also, then only thing I've written since my last update was expositories for school. 5, to be exact. I'm surre that affected my style a bit, if not alot.
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