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Post by badboy on Nov 25, 2006 3:16:12 GMT -5
The other day, I was walking down the street and saw the biggest, fattest @ss I have ever seen in my life: This donkey was obscenely overweight.
I immediately walked up to him, jumped up and down, pointed, and laughed in his face. I asked him, "Hey Donkey! What've you been eating to get so fat?"
He looked at me on the verge of tears and responded, "WWWhat do you mean? I'm on Atkins and I've been trying really hard... I've lost 12 pounds. I do yoga." I told Donkey that his diet clearly wasn't working. I then made fun of his cankles.
Donkey started to cry and told me how not every donkey can look like Eeyore, and how donkey insurance does not cover gastric bypass surgery.
I told Donkey that there is a way it he can loose the weight and keep it off for sure, and he wouldn't even have to stop eating. I told Donkey that all he has to do is throw up after every meal. When he asked if this was healthy, I said, "Definitely. But I'm talking about every meal... snacks too. This does not work if you are not committed."
Two years later, at Donkey's funeral, I was forced to re-evaluate one of my previous statements: Donkey was not the fattest @ss in the world, the rest of his family made him look like a long-distance runner. Maybe his weight problems had nothing to do with his genes, and everything to do with his lifestyle? "Maybe I was too hard on Donkey?"
I decided to answer my own question: "Absolutely not. He looked great, a little pale, but his physique had never looked better.
The moral of this story is... If you are fat and want to look good in your casket, try bulimia. It works.
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Post by me on Nov 25, 2006 4:28:06 GMT -5
lol
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Raistlin
Beginner
I'm tired.
Posts: 2,451
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Post by Raistlin on Nov 25, 2006 8:07:26 GMT -5
XD
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Post by badboy on Nov 25, 2006 11:07:46 GMT -5
Yea, my sense of humor can be sorta twisted.
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Post by me on Nov 25, 2006 11:08:42 GMT -5
I just like that part at the end If you want to look good in a casket Bulimia is for you
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Post by Inquisitor Loki on Nov 25, 2006 11:52:12 GMT -5
Ass
ZOMG I CUSSED
seriously ass is allowed
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Raistlin
Beginner
I'm tired.
Posts: 2,451
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Post by Raistlin on Nov 26, 2006 9:34:01 GMT -5
What does the "Z" in ZOMG mean?
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Post by Dagothkitty on Nov 26, 2006 17:41:45 GMT -5
Zizzle.
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