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Post by DEATH97 on Oct 6, 2006 23:13:23 GMT -5
Thats good, My favorite stories are the ones with the good twists that keep me guessing.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 6, 2006 23:15:49 GMT -5
yea. I got 3 majour twists.
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Post by Maliku on Oct 7, 2006 6:55:28 GMT -5
Wow, that was detail with all the gore. No wonder he is so ruthless in killing orcs.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 7, 2006 14:27:51 GMT -5
I always give my characters some reason, no villan thinks they are evil, they belive themselves doing whats right. I.e. Darth Vader turned to the dark side to protect Luke, Lord Ariakas killed his father for killing his mother, The covenant are trying to accomplish their spiritual elation. I mean, if Christians were told that they could reach heaven immediatly and the Muslims were trying to stop them by destroying it...
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Post by Maliku on Oct 7, 2006 14:40:17 GMT -5
Yeah, reading this and then what you posted on the GSG, it makes a lot more sense.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 7, 2006 17:16:24 GMT -5
What I posted there is about halfway through the story.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 7, 2006 22:34:38 GMT -5
Knocking on the giant town gates, Larn screams for them to open up, his throat burning. Slowly the gate creaks open, admitting him into the town. Seeing Illian, his childhood friend who grew up to be a guard, Larn bolts toward him.
Illian Varmarin stared bewildered at the Larn, his bestfriend's ragged clothes smeared with blood and stomach acid. "By the nine divines," he whispers to himself, worried with what might had happened. Drawing his issued silver longsword quickly, he stammers, “Dammit Larn, what’s going on!?” worried by the state his friend was in. Sobbing softly, Larn collapses, a hushed crowd starting to form. Swearing under his breath, Illian shoulders Larn and heads off to the barracks.
Groaning, Larn rubs his eyes. Looking around, he notices that he is inside the guard’s barracks. Sitting up quickly, he notices that he is wearing fresh, green flax clothes. Staring at him with wide eyes, Illian hands him some liquor. “What happened Larn?” he says softly, concerned for his friend. Shuddering, Larn drinks the entire container of liquor, enough to make even the hardiest of Nords drunk. Larn looks up at Illian, scaring him, because his eyes still show that of a sober man.
“An Orsimer killed my family, Illian.” Larn says choking, tears pooling in his eyes. “My son was dismembered and my daughter…she….” Larn tries to say, completely breaking down. Illian stares at him slowly, feeling enraged, as those were also his godchildren.
"The Count sanctioned a group of Orcs to kill a family of vampires….” Illian mutters, drawing the connection. “They said they were moving back into Ornisium though, so I’m sorry my friend that you have lost your family, but there is sadly nothing we can do,” Illian says softly, gripping Larn hard on the shoulder. Larn stares at him, his emerald eyes burning as if light by a fire within.
“Then who can help me?” Larn questions angered, wishing genocide of the entire Orc race.
Twisting uncomfortably in his child-hoods gaze Illian suddenly remembers how much his friend has changed from the dirty faced boy he once was, to the dark, now all business adult he is now. “Listen,” Illian hisses, making sure that no guards were close by. “There is a man in this town called the Wolf. He lives up by the large oak where the Dontons lived. He hates all Orcs, which is one reason we know about him. You could probably find him,” Illian trails off, as Larn quickly amasses all of his belongings and charges out the door. Sighing, Illian reaches for his sword only to find it missing.
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Post by DEATH97 on Oct 8, 2006 5:29:16 GMT -5
Plots coming along nicely, nice job. I'm enjoying this one very much Dagonda
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Post by Maliku on Oct 8, 2006 10:03:30 GMT -5
I like how he stole his sword. Anyway, can't wait for an update.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 8, 2006 10:51:12 GMT -5
Yea, this is my 1st linear story so..
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Post by RareCarpet on Oct 8, 2006 13:00:30 GMT -5
Cheesecake!
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Post by BloodMoonWolf on Oct 8, 2006 13:02:37 GMT -5
yea my character is mentioned whooot. By the way this story is coming out rather nicely. I can't wait to read more.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 8, 2006 13:09:39 GMT -5
This is the boring stuff by the way.
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Post by BloodMoonWolf on Oct 8, 2006 13:11:54 GMT -5
awsome. I really can't wait now. whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot. lol.
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Post by dogonda on Oct 8, 2006 13:13:33 GMT -5
You know whats wierd. Back when diablo 2 Lord of Destruction came out, i made a Druid named bloodmoon whos main form was a werewolf, Then morrowinds expansion comes out called bloodmoon about being a werewolf...
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